do the damn thing anyway

The night before my aunt started a specialized, aggressive treatment for her third go-round with colon cancer, we spent an evening on a rooftop bar in Houston next to MD Anderson Cancer Center.

She wanted one night (with one beverage) to enjoy a sunset, warmish weather, and music. We talked, laughing over stories about the boys of our youth, our adventure-oriented lives, and our crazy Italian "famiglia.”

They weren’t new stories, and some of them grew even more epic over the years, but that evening we told them anyway. We also talked about being in the moment we were in…the pandemic was about to begin and we didn’t know what was really going to be in store for all of us.

Doretta had fear going into her treatments but was also very optimistic. The doctors were onto something that looked very promising and she was a perfect candidate for the final phase of their trial.

She had been cancer-free for over a decade and was in excellent shape from healthy eating, strength training, and countless Zumba sessions.

We talked about fear and how her “No Fear” tattoo was her mantra.

My aunt hated having her picture taken, but I convinced her to let me capture her hand holding her drink as the sun went down highlighting her tattoo.

That night, she promised me she break the cycle of our family losing a person every year for the past 3 years (this was 2020) and swore she wouldn’t die in 2021. She did break the cycle…but did so by being the second family member to leave us in 2020.

I thought about redesigning her “no fear” tattoo and inking my own arm with it, but that phrase was Doretta’s. I know I can’t control fear and have always been more of a fearless kind of girl. Not fearless, but:

Fear. Less.

That’s my goal.

To be with the fear and fear it less so it doesn’t paralyze me and keep me from doing hard things.

We all have a relationship with fear, whether we want to or not.

Fear is actually a beautiful part of being human.

It is a guide, a protector.

It asks us to slow down, to notice, and to examine the stories that are within us…both innately and the ones that have gotten tacked on over the years.

In the end, I think fear is really a good thing. It’s ok to be with it and then decide what to do with it.

And if it’s a false narrative or belief that is limiting you that needs to be expired, maybe it’s time to move through it and do the damn thing anyway.

xox,

Michelle

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P.S. One way to “fear less” is to have CLARITY. Overwhelmed with your next steps? Feeling resistance to showing up? Unsure of why you can’t just do your marketing? It’s not a procrastination problem…it’s a fear problem. Tackle that along with getting some great messaging and brand strategy in a BrandViz. Book before March 31 and mention this blog and it’s $400 off.

P.P.S. Speaking of fearing less, check out my latest episode of “Be The Plan” with Aurora Higgs, a Black transgender activist, speaker, researcher with an unapologetic attitude toward being completely herself. Join us for this 🔥🔥🔥 episode as we discuss respectability politics, identity work, living for yourself, white saviorism, equity work, queer people changing the world, and changing your narrative. After the ep, subscribe to my channel.

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